So I personally believe now it is a VERY good idea to get away from planning your wedding, your fiance, and well intentioned but tiresome people who are waay to into the details of the wedding/reception before you actually get to the front of the church and enter into a lifetime/life-changing covenant.
For me that took the form of walking for two weeks with virtual strangers, praying, and witnessing to everyone that this can and should be a culture of Life. It was nice to have space and time to think and pray. The actual physical walking part was a bit rough sometimes, and night shift is always mentally rough, but those challenges actually better allowed me to focus on my relationship with God. Crossroads kind of forces a person to remember who comes first, and reminded me to trust totally in him.
I was again reminded that I am weak, I am a sinner, and I am not nearly as talented as I think I am sometimes. But God does not call the righteous, or the strong he calls sinners and gives them strength. "Who can we always trust? God!" He'll give us words when we need them, when we are weak then he can be strong in us, and when it feels like God has abandoned us we have to remember that sometimes he gives us the space so we can remember how much we need him, but he Never really leaves.
So after walking for two weeks I caught a ride home from Chicago with the priest who is going to be marrying my fiance and me. He's like a big brother to me and he has ALWAYS been there when I needed him, it was so awesome seeing him ordained right before I started walking, and equally as cool when I saw him celebrate mass for the first time. I've officially been to confession with him now and *sigh* best confession I've made in a long time, its kind of easier to see Christ in the sacrament when you already see Christ in the person. God is Love, and I know I am loved by the man who is in Persona Christe.
Then there was the long drive home, and while this man is a priest he is still a man and we ran out of gas because Father decided to push the broken gas gauge a bit too far. Hehehe, so picture this: a priest, and a girl in a big ole pro life shirt, a skirt, and tennies go walking down the highway with a gas can. . . sounds like the set up for a great joke, but I'm sure we were a sight to behold. It all turned out o.k., and actually it was kind of fun!!
It was an adventure to be sure but I got to spend ALL day with Fr. Jeremy and we talked A LOT, and I am so much more ready to be married. Between Crossroads and the conversation that lasted a lifetime I feel closer to God and my fiance (which I didn't think was possible). I am so looking forward to Friday when I can say: " I Erin take you Jeremiah to be my husband, I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."
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